I need to let you know that I have a new grandson. His name is Judah, and he is about 3 months old. I can tell, already, that he is extremely bright and talented, just like his cousin, Ashton (I'll bet you think I'm joking!). And he can sing. His mother sent me a video of him singing along with her, just now. She was singing the melody, and he was harmonizing. Seriously, it is awe-inspiring to me to see him trying to do what his mommy does. He has been listening to his mother's voice since he was in the womb, and he recognizes her song. He may hear other music, but he sings along with her. His daddy is very important to him, too. He tries to move his mouth and even his tongue the way they do. He tries to smile the way they do. He tries to talk when they talk. He will grow up to be like his mom and dad, whether they like it or not.
Judah's first (and last) pumpkin ride
I will admit to having regrets about how I raised my children. There were too many times when I was emotionally distant or when I was angry at things I should have been patient with. Thank God and my wife for filling the gaps, and now I am so proud of all of them. I look back and wonder how we were even able to raise three children, when we were so broken, ourselves. I watch Judah, studying his mom and dad, and I wonder how I missed it, when my own were babies. They were going through this awesome process of transformation just by watching our faces and responding to every action, feeling, or state of mind that we had. They were figuring out the mysteries of life, one little nuance at a time. It turns out there is actually a chemistry to all of this, and science is just starting to catch up with what has always been plain to observe. There is a power of nurture and bonding to bring health, growth and learning that is revealing the very thoughts and intentions of God in creating us "in His image." God shows us how to respond to Him by showing us how we respond to our parents.
There is a very small story in the Gospels that appears in Matthew, Mark, and Luke. It is the story of Jesus taking little children in His arms and blessing them. The disciples try to shield Jesus from the flood of parents bringing their children to Him. But, Jesus says, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these." I have a hunch that the kingdom of heaven belongs, not just to people that become like little children, but to actual little children. I believe that heaven, for lots of reasons that you all can imagine, is filled with little children. This little story is a beautiful picture of Jesus' love and care for children. Jesus goes on to say that, "Whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it" (Luke 18:17). I love that He uses the word, "receive." Sometimes, when we talk about this passage about child-like faith, we romanticize the notion of childhood. Children are wonderful. But, it is mostly because we love them and want to protect their vulnerability, and not just because they are cherubs, that they are wonderful. We, as parents, see something special in them, that others may not see. If we are wise, we coax uniqueness and purpose out of our children the same way God does, by "calling into being things which do not yet exist" (Romans 4:17). "The letter [of the law] kills, but the Spirit gives life" applies to our children, too. So, we bless them, and do not curse them, by speaking faith to them. Children are valuable in our eyes, but not because they are useful. They cannot make their own meals. They cannot bring home a paycheck to match what they cost us. They cannot even wash the dishes or clean up after themselves as well as we can. I believe the most important thing a little child can do, the thing she was made to do, is receive our love.
In the account in Luke is a small detail that is not included in the other two Gospel stories. Luke tells us that parents were even bringing their babies to Jesus. We might imagine a small child expressing childlike faith in Jesus, but Luke wanted us to see that there were babies in the group, who were not even able to express any faith at all, at least in the way we think of it. That is why I believe the emphasis in the story is the way a baby receives everything by looking on the countenance of his mother. Do you remember the blessing that says, "The Lord make His face to shine upon you?" It is His face that transforms you. I might be tempted to intellectualize my faith and make it about concepts, doctrine, and arguments. But He says I am transformed as I look upon His face. I know I can't physically see Him right now. But I can see Him in my spirit. "But, we all with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image, from glory to glory" (2 Corinthians 3:18). How does this happen? It happens when we see Jesus in His Word. The idea of the mirror in the verse is as a way to observe something so bright that we cannot see it with the naked eye. If we were to use a modern mirror, we would still be blinded by the sun's light. Ancient mirrors were polished metal, though, I suspect it was still dangerous to look at the sun. So we are transformed just by looking at Him. But, His countenance is so bright that we have to look at Him through the mirror of His Word. The Bible even says that, someday, when He appears, we will be like Him, for we will see Him as He is (1 John 3:2). What is this really telling us? It is telling us that, even though there are some great principles to live by in the Bible, and the Ten Commandments might be the foundation of Western Civilization, the real power of the Bible is its ability to reveal Jesus to us, so that we can know Him personally.
You, if you are a parent, have great power over your children. It is not the power of your checkbook, your disciplinary tactics, or your slices of wisdom. It is not even the power of your DNA. It is the power of your relationship to them that makes everything you are the model for discovering their own identity. No classroom learning will ever approach this power. So it is with you and God. You "receive" the kingdom by receiving the love of Jesus, like a little child receives the love of her father and mother. I don't think a baby ever says to himself, "I need to do a better job at crying, eating, and filling my diaper so mom and dad will keep me." I don't think a baby says, if I don't get the hang of this rolling over skill soon, I will not be able to progress to sitting up and crawling in time to keep up with the other babies, and mom and dad will be angry with me." A baby doesn't think, "If only I weren't so selfish. I've got to start thinking more about mom and dad, and less about me." In other words, a baby hasn't learned to think "religious" thoughts, yet. From your face (along with your touch), there is one profound truth that a baby receives: "I am loved."
Your baby responds to your love with implicit trust, and you become, not only her model, but her source of life, growth, security, and health. I was visiting some good friends the other day, and their six month old grandchild was also there. I noticed that she was taking an interest in me, and I gave her a friendly smile. But soon she realized that she didn't recognize me, and she started to cry. It reminded me of John 10:5, "And a stranger they will not follow, but will flee from him, for they know not the voice of strangers."
Now, I would like to share just a few words for someone whose child has gone astray. Perhaps, there are things you wish you would have done differently. In Acts 16:31, Paul and Silas tell their jailor to "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household." I believe that is a promise that applies to you, if you will claim it. Don't be discouraged. Speak only faith and encouragement to and about your children, even if they seem far from God. He will give you the words. Let go of your own hurts, and ask them for forgiveness, if you need to. Remember that this is God's desire for you and your children (even if they are all grown up!), and He loves to answer this prayer. Do you believe in Jesus? Then, believe that He loves you, and He loves your children much more than you do. This is child-like faith.